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Coming Out - It Only Took Fifty Years by Janis E. Mills

$7.50
I knew I was gay at age eight when my mother's definition of queer described me perfectly. I hid my truth and left small town Pennsylvania for the city life of Washington, DC. immediately after college graduation. My mother carried memories of tragic family deaths and a lesbian encounter of her own. When she questioned my lifestyle and said she would blame herself and not know what to do for the rest of her life, I thought she might take her own life so, I lied. My father, raised in the non-traditional life of circus performers, unleashed me to be whoever I wanted to be but I continued my double life of straight daughter and gay lover.

Then becoming a teacher and high school principal, I also lived a secret nocturnal life−my triple life. Bartending in shady parts of D.C., I was hit by a rock, saw a gun pulled on my friend, and witnessed fights, arrests, and marches that pitted straights against gays. I jumped from girlfriend to girlfriend, courted a few straight girls, and dabbled in activities far different from the straight educator I portrayed by day. On the day of my father's funeral, my mother proclaimed her recognition of my gayness. What I hoped would be a celebration of love and openness was anticlimactic. I had wasted too many years. My father was gone, and I had lost friends rather than share my truth. Against the backdrop of the burgeoning LGBTQ movement, I became a courageous trailblazer and did my own coming out in a big way, I married a woman. Now I share my truth with the world and enjoy the happiness that honesty has given me.

Do not make the mistakes I made. Openly love who you love.

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I knew I was gay at age eight when my mother's definition of queer described me perfectly. I hid my truth and left small town Pennsylvania for the city life of Washington, DC. immediately after college graduation. My mother carried memories of tragic family deaths and a lesbian encounter of her own. When she questioned my lifestyle and said she would blame herself and not know what to do for the rest of her life, I thought she might take her own life so, I lied. My father, raised in the non-traditional life of circus performers, unleashed me to be whoever I wanted to be but I continued my double life of straight daughter and gay lover.

Then becoming a teacher and high school principal, I also lived a secret nocturnal life−my triple life. Bartending in shady parts of D.C., I was hit by a rock, saw a gun pulled on my friend, and witnessed fights, arrests, and marches that pitted straights against gays. I jumped from girlfriend to girlfriend, courted a few straight girls, and dabbled in activities far different from the straight educator I portrayed by day. On the day of my father's funeral, my mother proclaimed her recognition of my gayness. What I hoped would be a celebration of love and openness was anticlimactic. I had wasted too many years. My father was gone, and I had lost friends rather than share my truth. Against the backdrop of the burgeoning LGBTQ movement, I became a courageous trailblazer and did my own coming out in a big way, I married a woman. Now I share my truth with the world and enjoy the happiness that honesty has given me.

Do not make the mistakes I made. Openly love who you love.

I knew I was gay at age eight when my mother's definition of queer described me perfectly. I hid my truth and left small town Pennsylvania for the city life of Washington, DC. immediately after college graduation. My mother carried memories of tragic family deaths and a lesbian encounter of her own. When she questioned my lifestyle and said she would blame herself and not know what to do for the rest of her life, I thought she might take her own life so, I lied. My father, raised in the non-traditional life of circus performers, unleashed me to be whoever I wanted to be but I continued my double life of straight daughter and gay lover.

Then becoming a teacher and high school principal, I also lived a secret nocturnal life−my triple life. Bartending in shady parts of D.C., I was hit by a rock, saw a gun pulled on my friend, and witnessed fights, arrests, and marches that pitted straights against gays. I jumped from girlfriend to girlfriend, courted a few straight girls, and dabbled in activities far different from the straight educator I portrayed by day. On the day of my father's funeral, my mother proclaimed her recognition of my gayness. What I hoped would be a celebration of love and openness was anticlimactic. I had wasted too many years. My father was gone, and I had lost friends rather than share my truth. Against the backdrop of the burgeoning LGBTQ movement, I became a courageous trailblazer and did my own coming out in a big way, I married a woman. Now I share my truth with the world and enjoy the happiness that honesty has given me.

Do not make the mistakes I made. Openly love who you love.

 

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Editorial Reviews, Awards, and Accolades

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I loved it!

This was such a great read. Being about the same age as the author I could totally follow her timeline through the years and all her personal struggles she was faced with. I commend her transparency. Her fight to get where she is today paid off. Congrats to her and Lori. Wish them much happiness forever. Carmela

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Janis E. Mills

Jan was born in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and earned degrees at Indiana University of Pennsylvania. She moved to the Washington, DC area, where she taught special education and mathematics for fifteen years before becoming a High School Principal and Director of School Improvement. She earned her Ph.D. in Instructional Leadership for a Changing Population at Notre Dame University of Maryland and taught Educational Leadership. Jan mentors new administrators and enjoys reading, writing, cooking, fitness, and volunteering while traveling between her homes in Annapolis, MD, and Rehoboth Beach, DE. Her most important roles are wife, sister, aunt, and friend.

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